Advaita Pez

Seagull flies outside the window, and I mistake it for a helicopter.

Not as absurd as it sounds, if you include the context - which is that said window is 24 floors above street level and that we live in the shadow of coastal mountains, and the collective exhale of those mountains creates a bridal veil of mist between there and here.

Thoughts of physics and light refraction and cognitive processing flood me as I settle into the fact that it is a bird. From there, how I should best spend my time to really, REALLY see what is going on in the world around me; how it all starts here, with me, and if my perceptual slate is not clean, how can I know myself and how can I help others?

Pez up, brother.

And I do. It's a monster Pez, this, so big that it cuts off the oxygen going down, it cuts off the life force going down, it fades me to ...

outside experience, where I realize that the images of self imolation in the ingestion of this were just that - images that I was watching.

Get it?

Me here. images there. Separation. Realization of separation, release.

Back to the computer, several hours of productive and non-productive activities braided together into a pyschic rope that leads me to Otis and the world beyond and THAT world beyond is

Hold it, world beyond. On the commute now, and trip up on the verbiage.

Pez up, brother.

And after the spirtual gag reflex subsides, I see

language is frozen thought, thought was that the world is beyond.

Separation, realization of separation, separation dissolved, release

...released into space of relationship, where the duality is so pronounced it's like emotional branding...

eyes, contact, move away (pez up!); anxiety, tension, move away (pez up!), distraction (from what?, pez up), qualification, judgement, pez Up!

And finally, like meditation where realizing I am away actually brings me here, the duality wave peaks get closer and closer together till I can hop from one to another to another, then lie down on them and BE the essence that only appears to bridge - because there is nothing to bridge and sleep into dreamless sleep which, upon waking, turns into another concept that separates and boundaries itself from me. Or I from it.

Pez up.