Gods ATM

Under the nite's blood red moon, I make a promise that is as well meaning as it is destined to fail: I will not think.

I've made the promise in different words at different times, but the premise, the value statement, the underlying theme of the promise to self, is that I will live in the place that I visit - sometimes several times a day, sometimes just a couple times a week - sometimes lost behind maya's veil for protracted periods of time - for good.

That place has many descriptions; for me it's a place of clear taking in (awareness me thinks), all pieces, without filter or judgement. Even observing is too strong - it's more diluted and yet clear than that - it's just seeing it all come in.

The motivation behind the promise is real; but at my present level of development, the whole thing is bathed in a pale naivete.

In the times that I am graced and dunked into the timeless space, there's nothing to be done. And when I'm lost outside of that space, there's nothing that CAN be done. I can follow the pointers, expand the awareness, but I can't force reality. It's always there unfolding, I'm a part of it (not the other way around), and while I can't jump from a to b (distance is meaningless there), I can keep stripping away the things that I am not, which will, I like to think, increase the probability of being graced again.

From the dualistic perspective, from which now I speak, the currents that push and pull me closer to and farther away from timeless can be likened to God's ATM.

Deconstruct with me.

The word is made up of people, objects, ideas / abstractions and forces.

Everything that takes place can be reduced to these four, and interactions they have with each other.

Love relationship? Person <-> Force <-> Person
Economics? People <-> ideas / abstractions <-> financial institutions / countries (objects)
Religion? People <-> ideas / abstractions <-> forces

More succinctly, we can say that the manifest world is involved in expanding and contracting.

Each expansion (growth /evolution / movement/ forward-ness / big 'S' - motivated-ness) can be viewed as currency into God's ATM; each contraction (entropy/breakdown / conflict/ small 's' self-motivated-ness) can be viewed as a debit.

That's at a macro level, but as ontogeny recapitulates phylogeny, so our macro translates to the
micro.

When I expand in the big S Self, I am banking spiritual currency
When I contract in the small s self, I am taking out that spiritual currency.

First in the journey it seems important to take out and demand a lot from god.
Second in the journey it seems important to bank up god's currency
Third step is realizing that having a neutral bank book puts me in a pretty good position to see what god actually wants
Fourth step is realizing that the whole metaphor dissolves in god-given grace whenever the timeless spot opens up for a full immersion baptism, or just a lite lunch.

namaste