God's Underlay

Happy and free, for the moment. Here's why: identifying as awareness.

to whit:

• I can only know externals through senses (touch, hearing, taste, sight) and thinking.
• All of these can be reduced to ideas.
• Something sees the ideas.
  
• Something that is NOT the ideas sees the ideas
• That, is the non-locatable awareness.
• Awareness contains me, I do not contain awareness.

Exercises to solidify this:

1. Read Berkeley many times to get the fact that nothing exists outside of experience
2. Use Greg Goode's pointer to identify where I think I am (above or below the waste - above. above or below the shoulders - above. Within the head - yes. Where abouts - a small marble shape behind the third eye. 'So you are a small marble shape object behind your eyes. That object is seen. Are you on the seen side or teh seeing side? The seeing side. And that brings you back to...non locatable awareness)

I finished reading Standing as Awareness last night. Working on Gladwell's Outliers, and the two have a common thread... people don't progress succesfully in isolation from A to Z. They need effort, talent, gumption, drive etc, but they also need context. Two acorns of equal genetic predisposition dropped in fertile soil and clay-sand-hell respectively will have two very different outcomes.

I was lucky enough to get to this point - getting pointers from Greg that turned a light on - due to MY context, which has had all kinds of ups and downs over the years.

If I hadn't grown up where I did, I wouldn't have put so much weight in realtionships.
If I hadn't put so much weight in relationships, I wouldn't have been so wounded.
If I wasn't so wounded, I wouldn't have looked for the unchanging.

So here I am, having been covered with a soft blanket of lightness from Greg's pointers. And whenever, WHATever comes up, i can look beneath, pull the carpet up, and look for the underlay, which is what I am. Awareness from which things arise. I don't contain awareness, I AM awareness.

namaste